There are times that I positively love being a paramedic: I love driving fast, with lights and sirens, I love helping people in their times of need, and I operate effectively during times of crisis. However, the closer I get to not just shifting gears in my career, but getting in an entirely different car all together, the more I find myself questioning why I got into EMS in the first place. Perhaps it was because until recently I was unable to identify my inherent strengths - but was rather focused on what I believed my strengths should be.
I do not like the algorithmic nature of EMS, being lowest on the totem poll, and the expectation from my superiors not to think for myself in regards to the treatment I provide. I do not like that I am chastised by my superiors should I deviate from the algorithm in my patient care, even if I can support my reasoning in my treatment. Rather than my mistakes being a learning experience, they become a festering sore and source of self doubt, which is only picked at and doused in metaphorical lemon juice by my bosses.
Giraffe dung is sounding awfully appealing.
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